“Let no man despise thy youth; but be thou an example of the believers, in word, in conversation, in charity, in spirit, in faith, in purity.” — 1 Timothy 4:12
Oh my dear girls (and boys, I’ll have a seperate post for you), we know this is a sensitive matter. And in all honesty, talking about the subject of purity makes us uncomfortable — but this is one matter we all need to dug deep and meditate.
The world today is hard to keep up, left and right we see objects that in a way takes us of the innocence we once had. When I stumble upon this quote, I kind of related it here in our topic:
“Women have a bad habit of holding on for too long. Men have a bad habit of letting go too easily.”
How you may ask?(Bear with me, You might be lost in this scenario so get ready! ok?) You see, guys have this tendency to decide fast and what they have decided upon becomes final, there is nothing you can do about it — when I say nothing, it means zero, zip, zilch, nada! Once he is done in the relationship, he is done — no buts and ifs. Please never forget this. I know you are confused right now and might say “What does this have to do with purity? So what if he decides fast? you’re just saying that cause it happened to you!” I’m just laying a picture in your head, now imagine that you are crying cause you can’t do anything to bring him back again, you’re begging and still not a change of heart. Let’s press the rewind a bit further on that scenario — now picture him trying to grab or touch something that should not be touched and then you let him, next time he tries to “score” with you and still you let him, and let’s just say it did not stop there until he got what he wanted — your purity. Now fast forward it again to the “he’s done part” — what do you feel? Betrayed? Angry? Sad? Regret? Now I believe you’ll tell me “I gave everything to him, my heart, soul and purity, yet he still left me! Why?! I thought this is forever!” — and apparently we can never turn back the time. (I’ll give you a minute to let that all sink it, we might have rewinded and fast forwarded fast, you might still be in shock. Take it all in).
We should not let the scenario above (that I really hope you grasp) happen, at all cost we must protect our purity and innocence. I Kissed Dating Goodbye’s discussions over purity is very convicting and really an eye opener, I suggest you read it and let those words — and this, speak to you. I pray that God will help us in this important part of our lives.
Always be on the lookout for this standard to every guy who are courting you. He MUST, not should and definitely not will, value your purity. If he’s trying to touch you anywhere (I’ll have a serious conversation with you guys, just hold on), run as if a zombie is there to eat your brain , or as if when he touch you, you’ll get an incurable disease— end it with him before you regret it, NOW! If he want’s to touch you, he must put a ring on it! (and by ring, marry you — not buy you any fancy jewelry, ok?). Do not be afraid to say stop and no! He’s not yet your husband! Ans most of all, he must respect you!
But how will we do that in this seemingly perverse world? With what I learned from I Kissed Dating Goodbye and our church, I would surely have a NO TOUCH rule on my next, and last (Lord this is the last!), relationship. We will not touch each other, even hold hands, until we are married. So if he wants to touch me, marry me — easy! I know that in this society of couples hugging while walking as if they are glued to each other, this is hard, but very possible — I’ve done no touch rule with my (recently, hehe!) ex for almost 2 months (I think?)— so it is possible! We just have to not let our emotions rule over us.
Honestly, I know I’ll have a hard time on this rule because I am super duper clingy and affectionate (yeaahhhhhhh, i knowww. not goood), but we have to stop the sin before it even begin, (This is a good title, haha!) thus we both [Mr. Future] have to follow this rule — with God’s help. This is for the relationship to blossom purely out of love and not because I get the advantage of physical intimacy along wth it — so I’ll lay this upon God’s feet and pray for it (please pray for me as well, actually let’s pray for each other).
Another one girls, do not dress provocatively!! Again, stop the sin before it even begin! Let us dress modestly (see how I used us? Cause I, too, am guilty of this) Please do not wear super short shorts, vneck with plunging neckline, bikinis and other clothes-that-are-more-expensive-but-has-lesser-fabric (why is that even the rationale behind it?) just dress modestly!
We are all accountable of our actions, the topic is really gone long — cause this is really a serious matter. With God’s help I know we can do this. Now, if we have become guilty of impurity, God is good and kind and merciful and loving, we just have to repent our sins, confess it all to Him and ask for forgiveness — only God can make our hearts and our soul pure again. Only He can help us in protecting our purity.
I’ll leave this one to you to ponder…
“For this is the will of God, your sanctification: that you abstain from sexual immorality; that each one of you know how to control his own body in holiness and honor, not in the passion of lust like the Gentiles who do not know God;” — 1 Thessalonians 4:3–5 ESV