(Now I am back with our division, apologies for the previous two posts which diverted our original layout system.)
Apparently in this day and age, they say girls mature faster than guys — so most of the times, we are the ones to carry them (baby them as well) — I pray not! A good friend of mine shared with me that maturity is sometimes dependent on the environment that we are in. And maybe (just maybe too), it has also something to do with us girls being so emotional that drives us towards maturity faster than the males. But sometime, it is not the case. Sometimes, guys are more mature than us and their age is way less than ours.
Mostly when saying maturity, what comes to my mind was the experience one has gathered growing up, sometimes measured by age. Only when it was pointed out to me that the most important maturity we should be on the look out for is spiritual maturity, (lol I almost typed manurity — haha!) as this one will bring both of you from the highs and lows of the relationship — with no one giving up.
Admittedly, I myself is still not on the same page as my age — if you have remembered my letters to my parents, it was there when I told you that I sometimes think like a 6 year old (I am 24 and 2 + 4 = 6, so. yeah, pretty much immature right?) and I know God is telling me to act my age (and also just today, I did something pretty immature — pff!). Thus allowing such things to happen for me to grow, now I can say I am at the age of 19-20, a sudden leap from the comfy 6 year-old, doing math would give me 4–5 more years until I think like my age (but apparently my birthmonth is next month already, so that would make it 6 now? I pray to catch up!). Why did I end up being a 6 year-old trapped in a body of a 24 year-old? Being childish is my ultimate defence mechanism. If for some of you being silent is, mine is getting back to the younger, innocent me — cause when you are young nothing hurts — and that is not good (it backfired to me, lol). Now, God is helping me catch the years. I pray, He too will do so in your life.
In the matters of the heart, the standard we should look for is a man of mature spirituality. You may ask, how will you know if he is mature in his walk with God? Well, let’s see…(here are just some of the things I think a spiritually mature man will have.)
- I think, if the man is already mature in his walk with God, no problem will take his smile away. Let’s just say, no storm can move his calm heart.
- Next one is, both your time with God has not diminished with him (and you) coming into each others life — it should either be sustained or better yet increased.
- Another is, he would have a positive outlook in life, for he knows that God is there with him amidst the trials.
- Also, he would handle your emotional immaturity with grace — in girls term, he will be handle your tantrums like a true gentleman.
- I think, the most important one — you are dating with a clear sign of happy ever after — marriage.
These are just some, there maybe a few more. I’d say let us observe a man who are mature in their walk with God and list down their traits — you may start with your father, actually you can ask him instead of observing him. List them down and add them up to your personalized standard.
Since you guys (as the say) mature slowly than us girls, that would mean you need to double your efforts and time — nope! a big NO! For me, the road to maturity takes time — just as a blacksmith makes a sword, it need a lot of heat and a lot of hammering (ouch?). There is no shortcut, there is only the road less traveled, especially when talking about spiritual maturity.
So if I were you, get yourself ready first. Otherwise you’ll both get hurt. Ask someone to rate your maturity level, if it is best (not good) enough to sustain a back-breaking relationship or you still need more time. If you do invest your time wisely in nurturing your maturity, you’ll be able to handle the love of your life well — I’m not saying there won’t be fights, there will be and there should be, but in the midst of the fight, you won’t be telling or doing something you might regret — something that might hurt her and make her feel unloved and insecure.
So before you make your move, check your heart and your maturity level. Ask God to help you, I believe it does not need hands-on experience (but I guess hands-on experience will really be hard to forget as it will imbued in your heart and soul), you may ask your father or mother on how to cultivate maturity in you. Also, trust in God’s timing, I know He’ll tell you when you’re ready. So listen very carefully to Him.
Maturity is for all of us, I think it is the way we react to things we like or not. The attitude we show others when we get what we want or not. It is how we act and how we think — and with God’s help and guidance I know we can be mature.
Maturity is also a matter of choice, you don’t get there when you get there. You have to decide and commit to it now, ask God to help you sustain the process of polishing you from a shapeless iron to a sharp sword.
I’ll leave this one for us to ponder on, I pray that God has touched your hearts and that you decide to take the first step to maturity. Have a great night everyone!
“When I was a child, I used to speak like a child, think like a child, reason like a child; when I became a man, I did away with childish things” — 1 Corinthians 13:11